By Mimi Rothschild
I’ve been meaning to post about this Georgetown Times article for some time now. This particularly unbiased piece showcases how four moms are choosing to give up their career dreams and more to stay at home with the kids.
By joining up with the Georgetown Area Home Educators, this group of women is standing firm in their call to bring Kingdom Education to their children.
Hagmayer doesn’t understand why people disagree with home-schooling, saying it is not a new practice. Before the federal and local governments decided to regulate education, everyone home-schooled their children, she said.
“We’re not inventing anything new, Hagmayer said. “We’re just going back to the basics.”
What a surprisingly true statement. Many public school administrators have this backwards idea that homeschool parents are doing rejecting the longstanding institution of the public school. In actuality, the public school is an institution in its infancy. Homeschooling is a tradition that has been passed down from generations since the beginning of time, really. To think that homeschool parents are entering uncharted waters by pulling their kids out of the public school is quite naive.
I’d also like to call attention to the article’s mention of the women giving up their career dreams. We live in a me-oriented culture. Self-actualization is the name of the game. After all, do we moms want to look back on our lives and regret that we didn’t go for that career in the thick of the rat-race? This mentality not only flies in the face of everything we know from God’s Word, but it also opposes our natural inclinations. Life is a time to invest in other people. Christianity is built on the concept of you-orientation.
A good example is marriage. Why are so many marriages ending in divorce? The simple answer is that our society reflects a me-culture, but marriage is a you-culture institution. Marriage can’t work in me-culture because marriage is one big sacrifice!
These moms are choosing to follow a different path, and in the end, they’ll be more fulfilled. Investing in a child is the most fulfilling act in all of human behavior. Why do we bang our heads against walls trying to get rid of this gift!
Yesterday we learned about how wealthy families are taking advantage of homeschooling as an optimal solution. Today, I came across an article from the Sassy Lawyer in the Manila Standard describing how homeschooling might be ok if there are no other options.
She starts out somewhat negative:
“Still, in a scenario where quality education is inaccessible or unaffordable, or both, I’d take a good hard look at homeschooling. And, in a worst-case scenario, I’d probably overcome my feeling of incompetence to teach my own children math and the sciences. In a worst case scenario.”
Ouch! She makes it sound like she’d have to be dragged kicking and screaming into the homeschooling world. In her defense, many of her negative feelings about homeschooling seem to stem from personal insecurities about her own ability to teach. These are feelings that all parents have when they begin homeschooling. She warms up a little to the idea of homeschooling by the end of the article:
“To sum up, homeschooling is a worthy option especially in view of the many failures of schools and the educational system. But the right of parents to choose to homeschool their children may not always be in the best interests of the child. As with most things, the advantages and disadvantages will have to be weighed on a case-to-case basis.”
Thank-you, Sassy Lawyer, for the illuminating analysis! In all seriousness, she makes many good points. I would encourage her readers to check out yesterday’s post on the Bloomberg story about Manhattanite homeschoolers.
By Mimi Rothschild
How would you educate if money was not an issue? Would you send your children to the most prestigious school in your city?
According to a recent Bloomberg article, many of Manhattan’s movers and shakers are no longer relying on outsourcing the education of their children. Whether they hire expensive private tutors for homeschooling or allow their children to educate themselves in an “unschooling” format, these upper-crust families are realizing that their children are too important to leave their education in anyone’s hands but their own.
“The growth of home schooling in Manhattan is part of a national trend. From 1999 to 2003, the number of kids being taught at home soared 29 percent to 1.1 million, according to the most recent survey by the U.S. Education Department. The city requires parents to create a teaching plan and to have students’ academic progress evaluated under state regulations.”
I think this is a fascinating development. For one thing, it blows the popular perception of homeschoolers being a bunch of rural hillbillies trying to escape from society. These are some of the most influential people in the city. They are choosing to homeschool, not for religious escapist reasons, but because they strongly feel it is the best academic environment for their children. Although they can afford to send their children to $30,000 private schools, they are forsaking this luxury.
“Leon Potgieter, who runs the 300-employee New York City office of Stamford, Connecticut-based consulting firm Towers Perrin, said he and his wife, Barbara, can afford any school for 9-year-old twins Luke and Sarah and 6-year-old Hannah. They chose home schooling because they decided that Barbara, 41, a physicist and computer scientist, could do a better job. Potgieter, 44, teaches the history lessons when he gets home from work.”
Again, these are not the uneducated right-wingers at which the mainstream media would point the finger. These are well-educated, urbane parents. Many of these homeschoolers have gone the “unschooling” route.
“While their peers are in school, Caroline and Jessica have the run of the town, to join clubs, visit museums and take classes. Caroline learns English in a teen book club, history from DVD documentaries and science at the American Museum of Natural History.”
That kind of freedom is what makes homeschooling so attractive to the rich. Why put restrictions on your child’s learning when you have such amazing resources all over the city of which to take advantage?
The South Florida Sun-Sentinel ran a story last week about a homeschool homecoming phenomenon in South Florida. Complete with a “big game” (Soccer, not football) and a dance, which I’m sure brought back a little modesty and chivalry to the world of dance, the homecoming celebration looks like a blast.
“We’re going to win the soccer game,” said Keeley Sproc, a 16-year-old junior from Oakland Park who plays midfielder and has been taught at home for about six years. “Then, we’re going to rush home and get pretty.”
Apparently homeschooled teenaged girls haven’t lost their sense of glamour in all those cabin-feverish years at home!
“I got really cool shoes,” Sproc said. “Sparkly.”
It’s good to see that these girls are given a chance to cut loose and “get pretty” for once. Sometimes it can be difficult in homeschooling situations to provide good, clean, fun like this on a large scale. Kudos to the enterprising parents and organizers who got this homeschool homecoming off the ground.
As homeschooling becomes more of a “mainstream alternative,” we’re going to see things like yearbooks, dances, sporting events, graduation ceremonies, and more. I’m excited to see how these traditional affectations of the public school world are applied to homeschooling. Hopefully it will bring a little bit of legitimacy to our world, in the eyes of the media that is.
I’m curious as to how popular this homecoming trend is among homeschoolers. Is there anyone out there who has seen similar celebrations take place among co-ops or other networked homeschoolers? Feel free to leave a comment. I’d love to hear more from this blog’s readers!
For those of you who haven’t been following this week’s series of posts, please check out the last few entries before reading these tips. It will give you some context.
As adolescence stretches far into young-adulthood, it’s clear that homeschooling parents need to do something to help their teens develop into healthy, productive, mature adults. Here are some things that parents can do to help smooth out the transition from the homeschooling nest into the mean, cruel world.
Encourage part-time jobs
Some parents are under the impression that teens should not have to worry about getting a job. After all, they’ll be working for the rest of their lives. Nothing could be further from the truth! A part-time job is an excellent way to prepare teens for life in the workplace. Every teen should have the opportunity to make some extra money while learning valuable real-world skills. The extra money that they will earn will be tremendously helpful while they get on their feet. It’s also excellent for college applications and resumes.
Establish strong fiscal responsibility
Young adults living at home with parents is a disturbing trend among our youth. When I was a kid, I couldn’t wait to get out of the house and strike out on my own. Today, college loans and a competitive job market for college grads ensure that teens will have a tough time making the transition into adulthood. You can help your child make the switch by instilling money management techniques in your homeschoolers. There are a variety of books available for such a purpose.
Establish consequences for mistakes
There are few things more damaging to a child’s development than removing natural consequences out of pity. When a teenager messes up, and he or she eventually will, it’s important that parents don’t bail their children out all the time. By not doing so, you are setting up your children for a life of dependence on you, on others, or on the state.
De-mystify perpetual adolescence
The concept of perpetual adolescence connotes the idolization of youth as being something that adults should strive towards, even as they age. This concept is highly correlated with Rosseau’s “noble savage.” It’s important that we instill a respect for the elder in our children. We want our teens to look towards adulthood with anticipation, eager to experience the freedom and autonomy that comes with being an adult. Today, young adults look at their lives with an “it’s all downhill from here” attitude. To break this perception, explain to your teens the benefits of adulthood from an early age.
So, how can homeschoolers circumvent the trends that I’ve written about in the last two posts? It seems that we Christian homeschoolers have many forces working against us when it comes to raising children properly. Here are a few tips that should help homeschoolers prevent their kids from growing up too fast.
Limit Television
Watching TV is a passive activity that requires little to no imagination. By limiting this kind of play, parents can encourage children to find their own fun with imaginative activities like books, pretend games, and role-playing. Even playing videogames requires interactive learning. This will also limit the amount of advertising to which your homeschoolers are exposed.
Provide open-ended play options
Too many parents feel that they need to provide expensive toys like Leapfrog computers or high-tech dolls that talk, chew, and even wet the bed. Have you ever watched a toddler on Christmas spend more time playing with the box or wrapping paper than the supposedly must-have toy inside? This stands as a testament to the power of imaginative play. A simple refrigerator box can make a great castle, bustling market, spaceship, or race car.
Play with your children
If you take an active role in your homeschooler’s play, you’ll find that they will prefer coming to you for a playful wrestle or game of hide and seek rather than head to the TV for a violent cartoon. Children naturally desire playful interaction with their parents. Make sure mom and dad are available for different kinds of indoor and outdoor fun. Family board games are great for inclement weather. When the weather is nice, head outside for a walk in the woods or a game of touch-football.
Talk to your homeschoolers
If your kids feel that they can come to you with tough questions, they will be less likely to seek out answers elsewhere. Wouldn’t you rather teach your kids about the birds and the bees than the suspicious teenager down the street? Your homeschooler should feel that you are always available to talk to about any issue. That way, you can act as a safety valve, ensuring that your kids aren’t exposed to age-inappropriate content.
Make your homeschool a fun place to be
If your homeschoolers feel like they don’t have to “grow up” to be cool, they won’t! They will be happy just being kids, content in their role as children. Girls won’t feel pressure to dress provocatively and boys won’t feel the need to bully others. Many of the problems that arise in elementary schools come from the pressure to be something other than a kid. Let your homeschoolers know that it’s ok to be a kid. Also, make your home the place where all the neighborhood kids want to be to have good, clean fun.
And how is the public school system responding to this dire social conundrum?
“The IPPR report recommends that the school day be longer so pupils can develop skills through after-school arts and sports clubs or scouts, cadets and martial arts. Parents should face fines if they failed to make sure their children attended some of these clubs, it said.”
Ok, let’s get this straight. Now you’re going to extend the school day? I wonder if funding is tied to the package of extra-curricular activities schools offer? How is babysitting teenagers with extra-curriculars going to help them develop into responsible adults.
This kind of social program will only magnify the problem. By extending the school day with frippery like martial arts programs or sports clubs, you rob teens of the opportunity to develop into adulthood. They will be unable to take on extra responsibility through part-time jobs, an invaluable growing experience. The programs are intended to help teens grow into adults. Unfortunately, it will only stifle their growth by continuing to treat them like children for a few more hours each day.
The scariest aspect of this proposal is that parents will face fines if they opt not to participate. The increasingly socialist state of Britain’s educational system rolls on. Stories like this make me grateful that I live in America. At least we have a choice.
Parents, if these trends worry you, take your kids out of the public school. If it’s happening in the UK, it will eventually come to American shores. Homeschooling offers a wonderful alternative to the downward spiral of dysfunction that today’s teens face in the public school. Check back throughout the week to find out ways to fight these trends.
Earlier this month, The Guardian, a UK News source, published a fascinating article about child development. There are many lessons to be pulled from this particular article.
Among other things, a recent study has shown that UK kids are much less likely to believe in fairies, goblins, and elves than their parents. Although this trend may be positive, it correlates to the decline in imaginative play among youngsters.
“Adolescence is also being stretched at both ends, with children becoming ‘teenagers’ earlier and ‘adults’ later. For too many young people this transition to adulthood is complex, messy and unsuccessful.”
The technological developments that trickled down through the industrial revolution had far-reaching implications for the development of children. There was a time when teenagers did not exist. Kids were kids until what is now called “adolescence.” Then, they entered the full-time workforce in farms or factories. Today, our prosperity allows our children to remain unproductive and immature until well into their twenties. More young people are living off their parents when they should be striking out on their own.
On the other end, children are no longer allowed to be “kids” for very long. They are bombarded with advertising and entertainment options encouraging them to be adults. Britney Spears was inciting eight year olds to don midriff-baring attire eight years ago. Influences like these tell kids that it’s not cool to be a kid. Rather, they should be doing everything they can to grow up and be like the vapid drones they see on TV.
On top of that, the social environment in the public school encourages these conditions with peer pressure on one side and demotivation on the other. At young ages, children are introduced to sex education and encouraged to be mature in their sex lives. When they are older teens, they are encouraged to skate by with minimal effort just to get into college.
By Mimi Rothschild
One of my favorite bloggers, Gena Suarez posted an e-mail today regarding a harrowing tale of a mom asked a question that no mom wants to hear from her eight year old:
“Mommy, is it possible for a man to have an operation to become a woman?”
Yikes. What do you say to that?
“Transgenders and transvestites. These were the topics that a staff member at Franklin School in West Newton chose to teach to a class of third-grade children. The school’s social worker described to the children that some men like to dress up as women, and yes, some men even have operations to change into women.”
When investigating the matter, the mother came up against confrontation and arrogance from the school administration. When she was unable to get even the slightest apology, she announced that she’d be taking her daughter out of the public school and putting her into private school. The school administration was none too happy to get this persistent mom out of the picture.
Eight-year old children obviously lack knowledge of sexual desires (at least they should!), how could they possibly begin to understand what’s going on here. Furthermore, children at that age are so impressionable that they might be intrigued by the idea.
For example, consider a young girl who loves sports and traditional “boy games.” She often wishes that she were a boy so she could fit in better on the field. These types of conversations are the seeds of what could eventually turn into the young adult exploring lesbianism. This kind of trigger can push a child in that direction when they would not have otherwise pursued it.
To me, this is the biggest argument against the legalization of gay marriage. Public school children will be faced with these questions from a very young age. How can we expect them to cope with these confusing, mature topics when many adults don’t even know what they believe?
By Mimi Rothschild
Dana Hanley’s recent post on the Homeland Stupidity blog chronicles the tragic murder of a young homeschooled boy at the hands of his own adoptive parents. He was starved, beaten, and generally neglected before eventually succumbing to their daily torture.
East Lansing Mayor Mark Meadows is currently promoting the increased regulation of homeschooling to prevent tragedies like this from happening.
Meadows fails to realize two key truths. First, increasing regulation among homeschoolers will do nothing to prevent abuse cases like this from happening. If parents want to abuse their children, they will find a way to do so in order to keep it out of the public eye. Secondly, this type of violence is far from unique to homeschooling. Public school students around the country unfortunately suffer from similar abuse, and little is done about it in the public school. In fact, the homeschooled student in question was enrolled in public school for a time and nothing was done to prevent his murder. As commentor Christine points out, the child had social workers assigned to him even after leaving the public school.
The unfortunate death of a child should not prevent millions of healthy homes from enjoying the freedoms of homeschooling. Increased regulation will accomplish nothing other than extra red tape and hurdles for well-meaning parents to go through.
Christian homeschoolers, please pray for your homeschooling
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